I Feel Butterflies
by EllieShelly
Summary: Garcia makes a list of all the pros and cons of the men in her life, to see who comes out on top. Little does she know that Derek Morgan has done the same thing, about his girls. Morgan/Garcia. Twoshot.
1. Chapter 1

Penelope slumped down at her spongy swivel computer chair and sighed. She span around once, letting her glitter encrusted toes skim the floor, and sighed again. Placing her head in her hands, she commiserated that she was screwed.

She had no idea what to do. For once, the all powerful Penelope Garcia was as confused and speechless as a bunny on meth who'd been abducted by aliens. She was even despairing to the point where looking at fuzzy animals with cute bubble captions next to them wouldn't soothe her worries.

Suddenly, it was as if her brain switched on. If she'd been a cartoon, a lightbulb would have pinged over her head. Typing with a renewed vigour, she flicked on one of her many monitors and opened up a new document, preparing to put her brilliantly hatched plan into action.

You see, Garcia had a problem. And that problem was that there were too many guys in her life, and she had to decide which one she wanted. The recurring voice in her head popped up saying for the _millionth _time that she _knew _who she wanted, but she crushed it down successfully before beginning her list.

**Men In My Life - And Why They Rock & Suck**

**Hotch**

_Pros_

- Hot in a sultry brooding way.

- Has a hell of a lot of power

- Thinks I'm an exception

- Has dimples!

- Wears seriously dapper suits (thought they could use a sparkle or two)

- Lets me do whatever I want (most of the time)

- Doesn't complain about my sexual innuendos

_Cons_

- Has a kid (albeit an adorable one)

- Tragically dead ex-wife

- Works _all the time _

- Practically drools every time Emily walks past (me thinky something's going on there...)

- Is best buddies (ha!) with Strauss, and has dragon woman breathing down his neck constantly

- Scares me (just a tad)

**Rossi**

_Pros_

- Hot in a older guy way

- Has squillions (think of the shoes...)

- Calls me Kitten

- Calls Strauss Erin to her face - aka Has balls

- Is a big teddy bear

_Cons_

- Again, works all the time

- Is a bit of a loner

- No one really knows where he came from - shady background?

- Isn't so into the wacky and wonderful

- Lets his dog slobber _all over me_

- Wears mainly brown (big no)

**Reid**

_Pros_

- Is a genius (like me)

- Has cute hair

- Wears cute socks

- Has an awesome mom

- Is adorably clueless

_Cons_

- Is a genius (and I think the main problem would be that our awesomeness and geniusness would collide and reverberate the time space continuum)

- Is odd

- Dating? Two words: Epic. Fail.

- Doesn't know what Twilight it! Not. Cool.

- Would make want to hide in my cave to escape the inane facts and chatter

**Kevin**

_Pros_

- Is a computer freak (like me)

- Is smart

- Gets me

- Makes showering more fun

- Stood up for me to Rossi (even though I told him not to)

- Can get out of the wormhole

_Cons_

- Is a jerk

- Dumped me

- Made me sad

- Makes horrible grilled cheese, and pizza, and pasta... And generally gives me food poisoning every time he even steps _near _the stove

- Doesn't pick up dirty clothes

- Makes me want to squash his face into the floor

**Derek Morgan (oh here we go...)**

_Pros_

- Is a sculpted God of chocolate thunder

- Calls me baby girl

- Calls me princess, and goddess, and all sorts of smushy things

- Makes me get butterflies (all the goddamn time)

- Is so. Freaking. Gorgeous.

- Makes me want to drool

- I want his babies

- We would have genetically perfect offspring

- Protects me

- Doesn't like me being sad

- Looks after me

- Enjoys me sexually harassing him

- Sexually harasses me

- Buys me shiny presents that make me giggle

- Thinks I'm beautiful

- Likes my red hair

- Makes me feel funny

- Stayed with me after I got shot

- Checks up on me

- I want to marry him

- I want to have a whole host of babies and buy trillions of dogs and cats and other domestic thing with him

- He doesn't let Clooney slobber on me

- I'm in love with him

_Cons_

- ...(okay, computer of all knowledge, I'm going to be honest. I got nothing)

Garcia sat back and displayed her list. Solid, informative, gave her all her options... Didn't _seem _to be biased (yeah, right) No, her hunk of beauty didn't come out on top _at all. _No no no no...

Wait?

Her computer buzzed, alerting her that someone else on her team had just saved a document in their personal files. Okay, so maybe she shouldn't keep tabs on them like that - but she really had no choice - what if they got hurt? That's why she did this... Not to find out about JJ's second bun in the oven, or Emily's first official date with Hotch...

No. It was for _safety. _

So she clicked on the link and raised her eyebrows as she saw the subject matter. "My List" from... Derek Morgan's Personal Folder.

Holding her breath, she clicked the link, not sure what she would find...

* * *

A/N: For part two, review me! First Garcia/Morgan fic, woop woop :D


	2. Chapter 2

A new browser window opened immediately, and immediately, Garcia shut her eyes as she saw a format very similar to her own. Did she want to know? Yes, as long as she came out on top. But if this list just confirmed her worst fears - that he only thought of her as a friend - she would spend some large amount of time wishing that she'd never read it. No, if that's what it said, she'd be far happier to live out the rest of her days blissfully unaware of his feeling - or lack thereof - toward her.

But then again... Was she really the not knowing type? How could she claim to be the Goddess of knowledge and everything in between if she couldn't tell anyone, namely Emily and JJ, about Morgan's feelings to her?

So she decided to look. Just a quick look, just a peek, to gauge the general mood of the list. And if it seemed to be leaning in her favour, she'd read the rest. She counted down from three in her head, and blinked open her eyes.

**JJ**

_Good things _

- Is pretty hot

- Makes me laugh

- Is nice

_Bad things _

- Is married

- Has one child (and I think another coming)

- Isn't my type - too normal

- Works with me

**Emily **

_Good things_

- Again, is hot (why do all the women I work with have to be attractive?)

- Is as hardcore as I am

- Can tackle like me

- Goes on Sin to Win weekends

- Is great with kids

- Is always paired with me

- Loves Kurt Vonnegut

- Carries a gun, and definitely knows how to use it

_Bad things_

- Carries a gun, and knows how to use it

- Has an scary boyfriend who could and would kill me

- Has a past

- Is probably as fucked up as I am

- I sorta think of her as a sister type

- Would probably end up castrating me

**Strauss**

Sick. Forget I put that...

**Cassie **

_Good things _

- Blonde

- Bendy

- Big boobs

_Bad things _

- Don't care about her

- Only want her for the occasional booty call

- I prefer red hair

**Mandy (I think that was her name...) **

Good things

- Gave me sex

Bad things

- Gave me chlamydia

**Tamara **

_Good things _

- Is strong

- I don't have to pretend to be anything around her

- Is a welcome distraction from work

_Bad things _

_- _I'm using her as a distraction (and that's not fair)

- Is a victim (sort of)

- Is screwed up, at least for the time being

- I'm not allowed to get involved with her

- Gave me her brother's necklace, after all I did was attend a hearing

- Uses me as a distraction

- The whole thing makes my head hurt

**Garcia **

Good things

- Is beautiful

- Is amazing

- Knows everything and anything

- Flirts with me

- Trusts me

- Lets me look after her

- Looks after me (though she probably doesn't realise it)

- Always talks to me

- Wants the best for me

- Sees the good in everybody

- Love it when she calls me Morgan

- Love it when she calls me Derek

- Calls me Hot Stuff

- Made me the most kickass Chief's office I've ever seen

- Keeps me company

- Keeps me in line

- Saved my life - in more ways than one

- Is my best friend

- Tells me everything and listens to everything I say

- Mama loves her

- I love her

_Bad things _

- She's too good for me...

Garcia read the last line, and felt her heart speed up to beating a thousand times a minute. He thought she was too good for him? Where did he get that? They were good for each other, she knew that. She knew that she brought out the best in him and he brought out the best in her.

That when they were around each other, she could _literally _feels the sparks flying. And although that was cliche, she didn't care. It was the truth.

Pushing back, she got up off the swivel chair and clicked her besparkled feet down the hall with purpose, striding with renewed vigour. This list proved it, that she should do this. She was Penelope Garcia, and she was a strong, confident woman.

No matter how much she felt like collapsing into jelly when he smiled, she was still her.

So she knocked on the hardwood door to his office and waited for him to okay her entry. When she heard his sultry voice utter "come in," she took a deep breath. It was here, now. This was the now or never moment that she hadn't yet had to face.

She opened the door and walked in, feeling the butterflies swoop and swirl in her stomach when he flashed his trademark megawatt smile at her. "Hey princess," he said softly, the office dark in the early evening light, "what you doing here?"

"Derek," she implored, walking over and clutching his coat lapels in her neatly manicure hands, "I'm not too good for you."

The colour drained from his face. "What?"

"I said, I'm not too good for you," she repeated, cupping his face in her hands. "So you better kiss me now, before I regret doing this."

It took him a moment to comprehend what she was saying, that she was giving him to green light to do what he'd always wanted, but after her words had set in he gladly accepted her invitation, locking his lips on hers in a passionate kiss.


End file.
